A HedgeHog's Dilema.

Stressed.Doubly Stressed. Bloody Stressed.

Yes, yes, this is another post detailing how Daily Life sucks (Especially for me and I really wonder why).

I'm starting to hate myself for taking so much responsibility, though I had ample warnings from my MJ seniors, and I still regret for not withdrawing.

So the question is : Should I withdraw now, and leave everything as it is for now?

But it's not one, but numerous questions which constantly flash in my mind.

"Am I Stupid?"
"Am I useless?"
"Am I different?"
"Why can the others can away when they're in fault? Why do I have to suffer in their place?"
"Why humans are so superficial?"
"Why are some people so rotten and disgusting inside, and yet they're treated like Gems?"
"Who am I really?"


Horrible questions which poisons the mind. I believe I'm tad close to being insane. And I know I'm gonna be in some teachers's naughty list for "not listening" in classes. I know I'm weird. And things does not help, or improve, when you have people who claims to be friends but make every attempt to make you feel even more rotten, more depressed, more... silent.

I guess,
This is why my eyesight seems to be worsening;
This world is becoming too Hideous for me to view.

My hearing declining ever rapidly;
This world has lost its music. What is left is noise and static.

My speech losing clarity and difficulty in expressing;
What's left to talk when no one listens?

I want my life back.