A HedgeHog's Dilema.

Stressed.Doubly Stressed. Bloody Stressed.

Yes, yes, this is another post detailing how Daily Life sucks (Especially for me and I really wonder why).

I'm starting to hate myself for taking so much responsibility, though I had ample warnings from my MJ seniors, and I still regret for not withdrawing.

So the question is : Should I withdraw now, and leave everything as it is for now?

But it's not one, but numerous questions which constantly flash in my mind.

"Am I Stupid?"
"Am I useless?"
"Am I different?"
"Why can the others can away when they're in fault? Why do I have to suffer in their place?"
"Why humans are so superficial?"
"Why are some people so rotten and disgusting inside, and yet they're treated like Gems?"
"Who am I really?"


Horrible questions which poisons the mind. I believe I'm tad close to being insane. And I know I'm gonna be in some teachers's naughty list for "not listening" in classes. I know I'm weird. And things does not help, or improve, when you have people who claims to be friends but make every attempt to make you feel even more rotten, more depressed, more... silent.

I guess,
This is why my eyesight seems to be worsening;
This world is becoming too Hideous for me to view.

My hearing declining ever rapidly;
This world has lost its music. What is left is noise and static.

My speech losing clarity and difficulty in expressing;
What's left to talk when no one listens?

I want my life back.

Looking for Lost ZZZs | Sounds like Z, Looks like Z, Comes in Triplets | Offering $ as Reward

Well, I've been "pre-occupied" for this past few months, and I shall remain in this state for God Knows How Long~, so I'll start off 2008's first post with this.

"BLOODY HELL, LIFE SUCKS. For now"

LOL. Sorry for the crude language above, but I had to vent these frustrations somewhere. I'm never good with destressing, cause I can rarely find things to keep me amuse, or satisfy me, so... Yeah, I suck at destressing. Not to mention sleep and Fun deprived. I miss spacing out, I miss doodling, I miss daydreaming, I miss napping, I miss my 13hr sleep Marathon too. I miss a hell lot of stuffs.

Anyway, at least I'm adapting better to the *AHEM* "Harsh" MJC, I learned how to at least do your homework with a 3/4 cooked brain, bloodshot burning hot eyes and also head splitting headaches which seems to plague me since Christmas 2007. Let's hope that my personal health wont go down anymore. Personally with a "strong" imagination, I can picture myself looking *@#&$^%*@^&$&@*@&#$* in the near future.

God knows how many more months are left to the bloody A levels, but it seems like Armageddon to me. The Judgement day for all JC students to determine if they are worthy of entering Universities or not, with the latter meaning you're as good as dead; Screwed. Haiz, let me do a mini checklist on my studies:

H2 Maths ; Shaky - Checked
H2 Chem ; Cannot make it - Checked
H2 Physics; Never had a chance - Checked
H1 Econs ; I lack Common Sense - Checked

Yep. A levels now seems like a galaxy away from me (Go figure how far is that o.O!), and I need luck. Lots and lots of it. Apparently I've used up mine during last year's Promos. LoL, first and foremost, a Thank You of HUMONGOUS Proportion to Ms Gladys from Miranda 2 for offering to give luck to me for free, but as of now I have yet to receive any =X

= I wanna play Pool | Billiard =